Happy February!

  Besides the fact that we are having 60 degree days, followed by 27 degree days, it feels like winter is on its way out.  The fireplace has been getting used, but not nearly as much as hoped, and not always at appropriate times.  Is it too much to ask to be snowed in again?

The weight is being stubborn, however, it is creeping away.  For some reason progress halts on the weekends, I think it has to do with the fact that the structure of the day is usually off. I'll wake up at 10, and not have my first meal until 12, then we might get lunch, which most times turns into a late dinner.  During the week, I'm on the standard 3 meals ( snacking when i have time or can remember ).

Current weight is sitting at 295.5, which is about 5 pounds for February.  While I would be much happier losing faster, I believe I am falling into the healthy guideline for weight loss, at about 2 pounds per week.  Besides the crater in my stomach, I'm really still not feeling the difference.

Today makes it 48 pounds.  I was watching an info-mercial the other day for some weight loss breakthrough, and they always show the super-cute girls with their ugly fat before picture.  While half the time I'm convinced that they use different people for these photos, what gets to me is the amount they lose.  When someone loses 40 or even 50 pounds, they are a new person, flat tummy, somehow you smile brighter, and your hair gets done nice... and boobs stick out more, and for most people, that much weight is life changing.  Well, for me that life changing weight, is probably about another 100 pounds. It makes it difficult to be happy about my almost 50 pounds, not to feel different, or look different to myself in the mirror.  At the moment my biggest fear is going to the doctor for my physical, and having him tell me that I need to change my diet.  I don't want to stop low carb eating, because I know what carb eating does to me, but I also want to be healthy.

If not February, March will be the month I start to integrate exercise again. While I think its a waste of a gym membership, I'm going to start off slowly and either just use the treadmill, or swim.  Every bit of me wants to pump iron, but I know that will get in the way.  I completely understand that its okay to build muscle weight at the expense of the scale, I'm just not ready.

Next............The Story of Parker